I like my sex mixed with concussions.
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I deserve this hangover.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize