If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Randomize
