tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Cover your peen. We're going out.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Randomize
