Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.
Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
We were destined to go to rehab together
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
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