is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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