Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
Randomize
