so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
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