Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
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