Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
