if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
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