is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
Randomize
