he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
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