You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
Randomize
