You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize