Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
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