Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
its liver damage thursday
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Randomize
