Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize