there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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