It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
Randomize
