You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Of course I have a pirate flag
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
Randomize
