So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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