He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
