That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Randomize
