i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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