This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Randomize
