She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
