O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
It was a blind-side dick pic.
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
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