i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
