ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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