apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
