let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
