I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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