I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize