It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
time to smoke my breakfast
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
