Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
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