I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
