Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Randomize
