After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize
