It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Randomize
