need another drink. this is the easiest way
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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