belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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