some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize
