My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Randomize
