i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
I seem to have left my pride at pride
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
We're too hungover to prance.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Randomize
