Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
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