That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
