We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
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