I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
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My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
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The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
She has the best kind of daddy issues
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
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