She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
We smell like vodka and hangover
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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