New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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