Pappa wants mamma naked
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
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